August 18 - Eating Alone

'Jesus entered Jericho and was passing through. A man was there by the name of Zacchaeus; he was a chief tax collector and was wealthy. He wanted to see who Jesus was, but because he was short he could not see over the crowd. So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore-fig tree to see him, since Jesus was coming that way. When Jesus reached the spot, he looked up and said to him, “Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today.” So he came down at once and welcomed him gladly' - Luke 19:1-6

One of the biggest changes in behaviour I have seen in the past ten years is how 'alone' people seem to be. It struck me quite forcefully the other day. As I was driving through town, almost without exception, every person was engrossed with their Smartphone or tablet – regardless of whether they were alone, or in two's, three's or more. The only conversation taking place was digital!.

Over the years there were times when I needed to eat alone in a restaurant. I was probably on an out-of-town trip arranging a residential placement for one of my work clients, or grabbing a quick meal during shopping. Because I was alone I went armed with a book or magazine, but usually ended up people watching. I recommend it – it's SO interesting, scanning the room, reading the body language, speculating on what's happening in the various relationships around the other tables in the restaurant. Has that couple over there just met and are on a first date....are they liking what they see? Is that a family outing, or just friends? THEY'VE had an argument!! Working out the profession of people is a good one – lawyer? musician? manual worker (what type of work?), Company 'boss?' - they are usually all there to watch and enjoy. (Interestingly, the Daily Mail online reports on August 9 2016, that solo dining has grown by 110%; the fastest growing reservation party size in two years).

In the "couple" category there is almost always at least one couple who can be seen sitting at their table in total silence except for maybe a "pass the salt please." How sad is that! Maybe been married so long they feel they have nothing left to say, they've said it all.

Instead of growing richer and deeper as time passes, it is a fact that conversation and relationships can become dry and stale - a comfortable silence can be a blessing, but if that silence is caused by the conviction that there's nothing in common left between them....well, is there any loneliness greater than that?

Sadly this situation applies not only to our physical families, but it also exists within our church families. How many of you have had the experience of sitting around the table with other church members for a pot-luck meal – you're sitting together, but you may as well be alone. Maybe you're a listener, not a talker. Perhaps you're a shift worker, mostly working at night and sleeping in the day – or a carer whose life by necessity is concentrated on another persons needs, You wonder what you can contribute to the conversations around you – so, sit quietly....people watching.

Barbara Lardinais poses the following: 'Do you have a relationship that needs a fresh infusion of warmth and communication? Here's your clue: could that be you sitting at that table together but in silence? Try to turn things around. You have something new to say; something new to share. Ask questions. That's the best way to get the other person to open up with you. If you don't, even if you are sharing your dinner table with another person, you are the one eating alone.'

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. - John 13:34

The music I've chosen today is - “I Will Never Leave You Alone” - LIVE. Click on the picture to listen.